Nothing Good Happens After 2AM

Does anyone watch How I Met Your Mother?? I distinctly remember a time in the show where they said that exact phrase- “nothing good happens after 2AM”. And I was like DAMN THAT IS SO SPOT ON. How many drunken decisions could’ve been prevented if I had just gone to bed? I could’ve been more well rested if I had just gone to bed instead of watching Lion King on YouTube causing me to not do so well in class the next day? Maybe I wouldn’t have gotten into irrational fights with roommates and friends if I had just gone to bed at normal human hours?

I think there’s a point in the night when things peak and then begin to go downhill. You start by having the best dinner of your life, maybe have a couple drinks and then make memories and laugh with friends for hours. You feel invincible and never want it to end butttttt theeeeeeeeeeeeeen. The eyes start to droop and you start deliriously laughing and getting the funny haha’s over things that aren’t even funny and can be convinced to make some really awful decisions.

Since I work pretty early in the morning, I’ve been witness to a lot of poor decisions being made. EEK. So of course, I want to share my observations!!

Story #1: I would have to walk from my car to the bakery every morning passing by MIT. I have to be fairly cautious when I walk hoping that I won’t get attacked or whatever. Most of the time I’m not worried. But this particular morning when I was walking, I heard footsteps slapping on the sidewalk faster and faster and I see a shadow approaching! AHHH. My heart is pounding and I’m gripping my keys between my fingers wondering if I have a fight or flight reflex. I turn around to see who it is aaaaaaaaaaaaaaand turns out its just a nerd trying to get into running. He’d run a couple blocks and then stop and walk with his huge headphones on blasting music. Why are you running at 4am? Why was that a good decision? MMMMMMMM betta not.

Story #2: Along the same lines of story number one, I was walking up the street headed to the bakery. Thankfully I was on the opposite side of the street when this happened but I saw an old man looking at a bike chained to a tree. I thought maybe it was his bike until he grabbed the tire and starting yanking at it trying to get it loose! HE WAS TRYING TO STEAL THE BIKE! He didn’t give a fuuuuuck about who was watching him. Maybe I should’ve said something to scare him off before he either stole the bike or damaged it but I’m a girl walking alone at night… I don’t want any trouble! Am I a wuss?? OH WELL.

Story #3: This was one I told in a previous blog post but I figure it couldn’t hurt to tell it again! I rolled up to the bakery in my car when I saw this man completely stumbling down the street and he stopped in front of the Flour door.and started knocking! So I’m sitting in my car waiting for him to give up and walk away but he’s obsessed with trying to get food or something to sober up. He takes about 5 steps away from the front door when he slumped against the wall and passed out. I wasn’t too comfortable walking in the front door with the guy who was just trying to get in leaning against the building so I called the cops who then called an ambulance! I saved a life! Or I made him get a really expensive hospital bill. Oops.

Story #4: This time I was actually working inside when a younger man dressed in jeans and a blazer comes up to the front door. He starts knocking and knocking. No lights are on in the front and the counter isn’t set up full of pastries so obviously we weren’t open. Not to mention that the door was also locked. If that doesn’t give it away, I don’t know what does. Most of back of house is hidden by a wall but occasionally I would walk to the dish sink or fridge and be in sight for like 2 milliseconds. Somehow he saw me and started to move along the window line trying to get my attention. WHO ARE YOU, CRAZY MAN AND WHY ARE YOU HERE SO EARLY!! I never opened the door and to this day have no idea what he wanted.

Story #5: Last but not least. This happened to me most recently. I was training a co-worker and was waiting for her to arrive to let her into the store. While I was waiting, I saw a car pull up in front of the store and a man got out and was drinking a coke. I didn’t really think much of it- he didn’t seem drunk or intoxicated of any kind. I just thought maybe he was traveling a long way and needed a break to wake up or something. I let my friend into the store but she’s skeeved out because she wasn’t used to seeing people or weird things that early in the morning. As we’re talking about him being outside, he proceeds to take his drink and pour it all over his windshield. Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Huh? Why???

Moral of the story- people are weird. They make some pretty sketchy choices after 2am. Myself included! But don’t forget that SOMEONE probably saw you doing something stupid. What have you done or seen that has blown your mind? Stay safe out their friends! Check back on Thursday for a Food for Thought post! C U L8TR SK8TRS.


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